Sunday, May 21, 2006


I discovered a new word yesterday, "quirkyalone." I discovered it in the way that many new words may be coined and discovered in the 21st century, through the internet.

Here's an explanation of what it means to be "quirkyalone" from the website,

We are the puzzle pieces who seldom fit with other puzzle pieces. Romantics,
idealists, eccentrics, we inhabit singledom as our natural resting state. In a
world where proms and marriage define the social order, we are, by force of our
personalities and inner strength, rebels. For the quirkyalone, there is no
patience for dating just for the sake of not being alone. We want a miracle. Out
of millions, we have to find the one who will understand. Better to be
untethered and open to possibility: living for the exhilaration of meeting
someone new, of not knowing what the night will bring. We quirkyalones seek
momentous meetings.

I am both these things, quirky, and most often alone. Similar to the definition, I consider myself an idealist, and an eccentric and feel very comfortable being single. I have no problem doing just about anything by myself.

I remember the first time I went to see a movie by myself, "Pulp Fiction." I felt a little strange, somewhat pathetic. What are people going to think when they see me by myself, sin of all sins! A single woman, alone! Thankfully I got over that one. Even though I must be honest, I do get pangs of loneliness every once in a while when I go see a film in a theater by myself.

I eat at restaurants by myself too. Most often I have a book with me. It isn't quite as fun as with friends and good conversation but it is doable. So are hikes. Those I prefer to do by myself as it gives me the opportunity to remind myself of how undefinable and awe inspiring nature is. So many layers of sound, texture, color, smell,...

I walk down streets at night, alone. That may not be the smartest but I am hyperconscious when I do it and I listen to my gut. Sometimes you just have to if you want to live your life to its fullest while being alone.

Traveling is something else I have done my myself. Again, sometimes its nice to travel with someone else and get out of your own head all the time. Or so that you will try soemthing you don't usually try. It gets you out of your routines. But at the same time, I love traveling by myself and being completely open to whatever the journey brings and whomever it is that I meet along the way. I suppose all of these traits make me a prime example of a person who is "quirkyalone."

It did make my day seeing a word that somewhat defined me. I have felt very undefinable, especially for a woman. No, I am not in a partnership. No, I am not in any hurry to be in one. Yes, I know that my biological clock is ticking but I spend enough time with youth. I am always glad to know that there are times that I can just go home and be alone. Yes, I could be a lesbian, but then again, maybe I'm not. In short, I am not definable by my relationships.

That is what I liked about "quirkyalone." Looking at Emily Dickinson's photograph I felt like I too was part of a group and was definable, for better or for worse.

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