Wednesday, July 11, 2007

A New Possibility

I created a second realm of possibility for myself and others tonight. I wanted to make sure to post it in here on my blog so that I continue to live my life by it. For some reason, I feel that posting it will make me stick to it.

Who I am is the possibility of love, limitless creativity, peace, and happiness.

The act that I am giving up is that I don't fit in.

And this is who I am!

The "happiness" part was hard for me to include. I have a tendency to be more concerned about other people's happiness than my own. And to be completely truthful, I have not been happy. But that was the past and now we are in the present and I am going to be happy, daggit!!! :)

The "don't fit in" part is also important. I find myself living in places where I do not fit in. I do this to myself and it needs to stop.

Now I must get some sleep. . .


Lyn said...

Greetings from Montana, Margaret. I discovered the comment you posted to my blog quite by accident this morning (guess I missed it since it addressed a quote on the sidebar rather than a post).

Thank you, mostly because it led me, in turn, to your blog and your thought provoking posts...


Anonymous said...

I love it. :)


Myrthe said...

Don't worry too much about not fitting in. Or at least, please don't adapt into someone you're not just because you feel you don't fit in. You will eventually always attract like-minded people (who might also not feel like they fit in).

For most of my life I felt like the odd one out. I guess I still feel like that, but I "solved" this feeling by moving to a different country where no matter what I do or say or how I look, I'll always be the odd one out, simply because I am a foreigner. By actually not fitting in, I feel a lot more at ease now. And it gave me the self-confidence to not care about not fitting in.

As for the happiness, don't force yourself to be happy, when you don't feel happy. Acknowledge your feelings and think about what would make you happy and try to work towards that.

Oh gee, here I am, waxing all theoratically about happiness and fitting in, where I made a fairly big mess of my life when it comes to happiness! ;-)

margaret said...

What worries me, Myrthe is that I pick to live places that I don't fit in or where I know that I will not want to stay forever. One of my friends today asked me if I have ever lived anywhere where I considered spending the rest of my life. The answer is no. New Orleans and Guatemala held some appeal but spending the rest of my life in one of these places? I can't even imagine it. There are too many places to be...
Do you really think you have made a big mess of your life in terms of happiness? Well then, we both must work on this! I just want to be content where I am at, which doesn't mean becoming complacent.

Myrthe said...

You know, so many people ask me if I want to live in Armenia for the rest of my life. My answer always is that the rest of my life will hopefully still last for a long time and that I don't know what will happen in the future. But for now I am where I want to be, that is in Armenia. Maybe that will change at some point, maybe it won't.

As for happiness, for me happiness is not a continuous state, because even if that would be possible in general, for me it seems impossible to be happy as a longer lasting state of mind. For me, happiness is in moments. When my cat makes me laugh out loud, when I enjoy the landscape, when I have a good time with friends, when I lie next to my sleeping boyfriend.

The thing that keeps bugging me is that I keep having to fix problems concerning basic things: work and living quarters. I recently feel like I got stuck on those two and that I am somehow incapable or unable to move on. I am not saying that would these two problems be solved, I'd be happy, but I would be able to direct my energy into other things, more satisfying things. Maybe, I feel like I need to grow or learn, but I am not in a situation for that right now. Anyway, this is going somewhat off-topic.

margaret said...

I wonder what is keeping you stuck. I have to say that Landmark has helped me look back at some of the patterns of my life and try to resolve them. The biggest one is living places where I know that I won't want to stay.
And you are not off topic :)